I take that back; there was one kid asking for it and I broke character for a bit. He came out of no where with a backpack (yes... I said backpack) attached to a gigantic two-chambered, 5-pump, semi-automatic water gun. We just stare at one another, sizing up each other and checking out our surroundings and possible hiding spots. I look at the impressive weapon he's holding and then to his once 'innocent' face which now shows a toothy grin as we both realize he has the upper hand. There are trees everywhere I could run to if needed be. Should I call out "CHUIY DUIY!' (HELP!) and then be rescued like the fragile American I am? But then it hits me. I remember I have at least one weapon I can rely on. Being the 'farang' I am being watched all the time. The boy knows this. I know that the boy knows this. And he knows that I know that he knows this. So I smile right back at him. It's time for the impact. He sprays me on leg. Okay. That wasn't bad. People have noticed and started laughing Good....Good. I have their attention. He sprays me again. Some others tell him to stop which is what I was expecting. But his clothing is soaked from head to foot which tells me he is not one to give up so easily. He sprays me again. I am utterly helpless and waiting for someone to help level the playing field. He sprays me again. I force a laugh which muffles a silent cry born from cultural confusion and the deeper realization of my vulnerability; not only in this moment but what has accumulated for the past four months. The flowing water has created its own river of thoughts in my mind. Why didn't Peace Corps talk to us about the do's and don'ts of water warfare during Songkran? How far does my humiliation have to go in order help bring about sustainable community development? Why the heck didn't I just buy that $1 water pistol back there? Then the water stops. I look up to see a goddess standing before me grasping the barrel of the little boy's gun. His toothy grin wiped from his face like....well... when candy is taken from a baby. His gun suddenly becomes heavy under his small arms as they fall limp to his side in defeat. Our spirits are both crushed as we stand facing each other both drenched in water and failure. His pain is one all too familiar to me. We look at each other again. This time, something is different; it feels lighter. He smiles his toothy grin which coerces me into smiling. As I slowly approach him, I can feel the significant change of weight of my clothes. Building trust can be the most difficult task in integrating into a community and because I always have eyes on me I want to do it right. I ask him the usual question: Have you eaten yet? Then more questions about the festival and eventually if I can see his water gun. His toothy-grinned face turns to one of shock. I explain that in America we don't have guns like the one he has and I want to see how it works. He is still hesitant. Clever boy. But then, in his last and fatal moment of weakness he hands me his only means of defense. As I look over the machine that once brought about my demise I realize I have two options: 1. Hand back the gun and tell him I had fun playing with him so I build a potential beneficial community relationship OR 2. Put him in his place and send a message to all the others that I am not the fragile farang as they initially thought. I chose the latter. I pull the trigger and start spraying him unmercifully. The same look of confusion that I once wore is now on his face as he tries to escape my watery wrath but is stopped by his own device which is still secured to his backpack full of water. I notice the water level is still high. Excellent. Just when I can taste the victory our match is stopped suddenly. The once heavenly goddess whom I once deemed my protector is pulling my prey away from me and telling me it is time to eat. Again? Now?? That toothy grin will be the last image I remember from that brief and bitter battle.
Oh well.
There's always next year.
Other more notable stuff that happened:
- Lost my Life
When I say I 'lost my life' I realize that is a bit extreme but that is certainly how I felt. When you loose your external hard drive that has EVERYTHING from your past on it, you get a little upset. Pictures from my all my travels, friends and family, papers from school, project ideas, music, movies and so forth. Gone. When I say loose, I mean Mother Nature and Irony get together and decide to have a one-night stand. So Mother Nature (flooding) hits and I moved everything up or at least out of the path of the flood water coming into my room. Enter stage right Irony. I have a degree in this exact field and I know better than to leave my technological toys out in the open when there is water up to my calf. I realize my mistake because someone had moved some objects (which were in a perfectly stable and comfortable place located on my bed) to a 'more secure' spot higher, and thus further away, from the water. Higher = Better. Mother Nature and Irony look at each other and their worlds collide. My hard drive falls into the water. Mother Nature and Irony laugh at life and enjoy the moment they are sharing. The water creeps its way into the plastic casing of my hard drive and silently washes away the moments that made me who I am. Irony wakes up the next morning and quietly sneaks out, not wanting to wake up Mother Nature who is still sleeping soundly in my room (ie flood water won't leave).What seemed like a fun idea to Mother Nature and Irony is now just an awkward situation in where someone doesn't call the next day, ignores texts, someone gets hurt, and has a big breakdown. Namely me. After a good afternoon of just sitting and staring at the flood waters mocking me, I realize that the situation can't be helped. I can't fix the situation and have to leave it in its awkwardness. I go to my room and grab my camera to take the first picture of my new life: the flooded backyard of my house. Moral of the story is don't get caught up in the memories of the past and because it takes away from creating new ones. Also, respect Mother Nature; she's been through a lot.
- Me teach English Good
As a Community-Based Organizational Development (CBOD) volunteer, we are not considered teachers like the Teacher Collaboration and Community Outreach (TCCO) volunteers. But for some strange reason, any farang is automatically labeled an English teacher. I can speak English and Thailand wants English teachers. 1+1= 2. I get it. the math doesn't lie. That being said, one activity that I have started to really enjoy is teaching English. I do it every Friday with children anywhere from 7-12. So far, the numbers have gone from 10 children to 20. One of my biggest obstacles it that they are all at different levels so I've just been teaching the alphabet and some basic vocabulary. I give teachers a ton of credit in balancing the lesson plan to adapt to everyone's levels. Last week, I had one little boy who became so overwhelmed that he started to cry after writing the first few letters of the alphabet. I went over to ask him what the matter was and he told me "he can't write well". Nearly broke my heart so I gave the rest of the students a coloring task and tried to get him caught up with the help of another adult. FYI, coloring is the best time-waster if you are ever in a crunch. After the lesson, I gave him and a few of the other students letter tracing worksheets and they seemed happy to learn more English. They were also printed on scrap paper (enter your own clever segue here). Earth Day also landed on a Friday this year so I was able to incorporate a small project around that. I made a "hands on" project and had all of the children and even some adults make a cut out of their hand and then draw a picture of something they think about when they think of Earth. Now, I have a nice poster board at my SAO which is covered in doodles of trees, mountains, and lakes. I am slowly getting the hang of the teaching thing but still not used to the little ones calling me "Teacher." With my lessons there aren't tests, just fun and games and a project they can take home at the end of the day. My goal is to create an army of little teachers so when they go home they share what they have learned with their families. That is the first phase of my plan for world domination.. I mean... er... building a network for stronger community collaboration. Yeah that's it.
- I'm homeless
After a month of living at site the volunteers get to find their own place to live. My host family has given me the option to stay with them for the next two years and I accepted it. It has been a month and I am seeing all of my friends move into gorgeous homes at their sites. I think about how it would have been if I would have moved out on my own but then I think about my current situation. My sister is also my field counterpart at my SAO. She knows practically everyone in my area which will help me in project planning. I don't have to worry about finding furniture and other appliances such as air-conditioning and wireless. Plus, this will force me to improve my Thai. I actually have a pretty nice little set up here and they are building me a room off of their house so I will have my privacy but still be around if I need them. Having a little sister, 7 years old, is a great way to learn Thai and teach her English. The past few nights we have been playing word search games and I will ask her what it is in Thai. This turns into charades in which we both say the word in Thai and English then act it out. My favorite is 'bee' or 'pung' in which we fly around and try to sting each other with our rears. Don't judge. It's all in the name of education.
- Thai-napped for a day
Many volunteers have experienced this already. The definition of "Thai-napped" is the act or situation where an individual is unknowingly thrown into a different situation than they intended/planned. This can be initiated by a familiar Thai person or complete stranger. Some examples include being dragged to a funeral, festival parade, a huge luncheon, or a stressful vacation or relaxing business trip (yes, I meant it that way). The duration of the Thai-nap is unknown to the victim and can last anywhere from a few hours to days. So, the weekends are our time to relax. However, last weekend I felt that I didn't show my face enough in my community. My sister's supervisor/my counterpart wanted her to come to an event where they were handing out food kits that were donated by Honda. We had just finished an intense week of work and both didn't want to go but knew that it would be better if we did. So we made a plan to go for 3 hours and return at noon. That was mistake #1. Never expect to return home at a specific time. Turns out the Nai-Amphur (similar to a county head/commissioner) and his wife were making an appearance. I had met his wife before and she speaks English so it was nice to see her again. My sister and I were enjoying our time being able to stand in the back and observe and thankful we didn't have to work. That was mistake #2. Always look your best and be prepared because your duties will always change. Before I knew it I was being told I was to sit next to them at the front of the crowd and hand out the kits. Twenty minutes later, I am being invited to have lunch at their table. Oh no, now they are talking with my sister and keep looking at me. This can't be good. Twenty minutes after that (which is now 1:00pm) I am being wisked away in the Thai Red Cross Society van with the Nai-Amphur's wife back to her house. I have no idea where I am going, who these people are, or when I was going to see my house again. That was my last mistake; having certain expectations. I had only met her once before so, needless to say, I felt nervous. She ended up giving me one of the most relaxing and life enlightening experiences so far. She gave me a pair of Thai fisherman's pants, which has to be the most comfortable piece of clothing I have ever worn. She showed me pictures of her wedding and explained some of the differences between Thai and Western ceremonies. She shared some of the simple pleasures and hobbies of hers such as traveling and photography and flowers which I also enjoy. And then she arranged for us to visit one of the many waterfalls in the area. So instead of returning home around noon and relaxing at home, I returned home around 6:00pm and learned a few life lessons and made a new (VIP) friend. However, this last weekend she called me and told me that her and her husband were set to move out of Thung Song. We will keep in touch as we both enjoy talking in our mix of Thai-English but I can't help but feel the situation is bittersweet. It seems a lot of my relationships with my most important friends (both in Thailand and the U.S.) have been put to the distance test lately. Being Thai-napped is just another ambiguous situation that you have to learn to appreciate and embrace. One aspect of Thai life that is shared by everyone is that we live day by day and never know what is going to happen. It is almost like a create your own story book. If you go down a certain path, it influences the rest of your day. You can't choose a path and then keep your thumb on the page and go back to where you were if you don't like it. You generally have to stick it out for better or worse because you never know how it's going to end. So for me, the question is should I go to page 24 and save the princess or turn to page 47 and travel through the graveyard?
